Don't Look for Happiness. There's Something Way Better.

Have you ever been to a buffet that was ever as good as you expected it to be?   At first, you might have looked at all the food, and thought.  This is going to be amazing!   It may have even started out that way.  But the thrill fades doesn’t it?    The more you eat, the less thrilling it becomes.   By the time you’re done, forget feeling thrilled.  No, you feel a bit queasy and uncomfortably full.  

Nothing really lives up to its billing, does it?  It may bring some happiness, even a lot of happiness, but does it last?   It’s why they came up with the term, buyer’s remorse.   When you bought it, it seemed so awesome, but now weeks later, not so much.   Or it could be worse.  You could look at it, and say to yourself. Why did I buy that?  What was I thinking?  But it’s not just stuff you buy, it’s anything.  At some point, the feelings fade.      

   

All of that disappointment shouldn’t surprise us.  Nothing can ever sustain our happiness forever.   In fact, likely, something that really makes us happy, at some point, will also make us sad, maybe even angry.    Think about it.   Your spouse may make you happy, but doesn’t he or she drive you nuts at times?   Or even think about a sports team you love.   At some point, the Dolphins probably made you happy, but haven’t they also made you sad, even angry.   Yet, here’s the crazy thing.   People keep looking for all of those things to give them happiness both now and forever.   And yet it never happens, nor can it ever happen.

So why do people look?    They sense that something like what they’re seeking does exist.  And here’s the good news. They’re right.  It does.   And if you want to find it, in the words we’re about to hear, God shows the way.  So let’s hear what God has to say. 

Romans 5:1-11  

Why do people look for happiness?  They believe it exists; that somewhere out there the way to happiness can be found.   Yet, here’s the problem.   Happiness, at least the way most define happiness, can’t be found.  But something deeper and richer can be.   What you and I truly need is not happiness.  What we need is joy.   And here in these words, Paul shows us that joy comes not because we gain it.   Joy comes when we realize that God has already graciously given it.  

But before we look at how God gives it, let’s look at why we need it, why joy gives so much more than happiness ever could.   To see that, you need to ask first; what do I mean by happiness?    If you are like the vast majority of people, happiness means you want to feel good.   And why do you feel good?   Your life is going well.  You have good health.  What you want to buy, you can.  You don’t have a lot of stress or worry.  As the psychologists put it, “your happiness is all about drive reduction. If you have a need, a desire -- like hunger -- you satisfy it, and it makes you happy.   You become happy, in other words, when you get what you want.

But come on now, how often does that happen?  Even Mick Jagger said it.  You can’t always get what you want.  And if you do get it, it still doesn’t really do the job, does it?  It’s why even a buffet can’t fully satisfy.  But still people think.  A better buffet must lie around the corner.  And if I got that one, then I’d be happy.   Here’s the truth.  It doesn’t, and you won’t.  

Happiness depends on our circumstances, and rarely in life will your circumstances so line up so as to give you the happiness you want.   And when they do line up, how long do those circumstances last?   What you need, what everyone needs is something that doesn’t depend on circumstances, something that you can rest your life on, no matter what life brings your way. 

And that’s where joy comes in.   Look at what Paul says.   Paul writes.   Not only this, but we also rejoice in sufferings.   How can you rejoice in suffering?   Because when you have joy, not only will your suffering not take your joy away.   Your suffering can cause your joy to grow deeper.   How does that happen?   Because in the midst of the pain, your heart grows stronger.  Your character grows greater.  Your hope in God goes higher than before.  And why does that happen?  Because God’s love becomes more real than ever.   You find God pouring his love right into your heart.     

Many years ago, I had a woman break my heart.   We were engaged to be married, and she walked away.   I was devastated.   I was about as far away from happy as I’d ever been.   In the midst of that, I remember talking to my cousin, Martha.   About five years before, her marriage had ended due to her husband’s unfaithfulness.  And this is what she said to me.   I will never forget.   She said, “Kennedy, I envy you.  I remember in the midst of my heartbreak, how God came near.   I had never felt God’s closeness and presence like I did then.”    And as she said it, “I knew exactly what she meant.”   I did not have happiness.  But I had discovered joy.   In the midst of my pain, the intimacy I experienced, the sense that every moment God was loving me, comforting me, standing by me.   I will never forget it.  Over 15 years later, I cherish those months as some of the most precious of my life.   And countless others have recounted similar experiences throughout history.     

What was going on?  In the midst of my heartbreak, I couldn’t rejoice in my circumstances.  I hated my circumstances.  But I learned.   I could rejoice in God, and God was not susceptible to my circumstances.  God could lift me above them.   I still felt pain, sadness, unhappiness, but underneath it all, a current of joy flowed through me, a joy that nothing could take away.

And, when you seek for happiness, this is actually what you’re seeking, something that goes this deep, that cannot be shaken by anything.   But often when things are going great, you can’t see this.   Your good circumstances almost anesthetize you to your need.  They dull your senses to what you truly hunger for.   It’s almost like they act like junk food.   They fill you up for a while, but they don’t give you what you really need.   But when joy comes your way, then you realize.  That’s what I was looking for all along.

But that’s not all of it.  Joy, Christian joy, not only brings you an assurance that God will never leave you nor forsake you.  Christian joy assures you that in the midst of all you face, God is bringing you forward into greater beauty, greater love, greater joy than you could ever imagine.   It’s what Paul means when he says.  We rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.   That’s the hope of the glory of God.  You don’t have it yet, but joy has given you a taste.   And so you know whatever happens, it’s simply a bump on the road, the road that leads to the fulfillment of all you yearn for life to be.   

The writerC.S. Lewis put it this way.   Let’s say you are lost in the woods.   So when you see a sign post, it’s a huge deal.  Finally something that gives you some direction, some hope.  You might even stay and linger beside it.  After all, you don’t know when another will appear.    But when you’ve found the way, then sure, you note the signpost.  You’re grateful for the authority that put them up. But it’s not that big a deal.  Why?   You’ve found the road.   So even if the signpost is gorgeous, engraved in silver and gold even, you don’t linger beside it.   After all, you want to get where you are going.      

Food, drink, friends, success, acclaim, popularity, all the things that you think if I have that, that will give me the joy.   Those are simply signposts.  Enjoy them.  Some of them are awesome, engraved in silver and gold even.  But they’re only signposts pointing to your ultimate destination, to life with God forever.   Knowing that frees you.  You can enjoy all the good things of life but you place your ultimate trust in them.  You know what they are.  They’re simply signposts pointing you to where you were created to be.   

So how do you get this joy?  How do you know that God will never leave you or forsake you?  How do you experience the certainty of the beautiful, glorious destiny that awaits you? You realize what God has already done for you.  And what is that?  Paul tells us here.  While we were still helpless, lost, Christ died.    Even when we had so radically missed the mark, God still gave up everything for us.   God in Jesus took the death that rightly belonged to us.  And in that death, God made it right.  God made us right.  And when you really see that, oh, then the joy comes.  When you see, Jesus went through infinite suffering so that you can have infinite joy; that Jesus lost more than you can ever comprehend, to give you a life, a destiny more beautiful than you could ever imagine.   That’s where you live.  You live on the other side of the cross, of that radical gift.   That’s what the cross proclaims, that stunning, breathtaking gift for you.   And as you get that, what that cross brings into your life, then you’ll know the love; you’ll feel it being poured into your very heart.  And in that love, joy will come, a joy that nothing can shake, a joy that leads you day by day into the glorious future of the children of God.   So enjoy life but rejoice in the One who was broken for you so that you might be made whole now and forevermore Amen.